MORE JOKES!
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
Why do we say something is out of whack? What's a whack?
If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
When someone asks you, "A penny for your thoughts", and you put your two cents in,
what happens to the other penny?
If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?
Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with.
When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?
Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?
Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
Why isn't 11 pronounced "onety one"
If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians
can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons
debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?
If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?
What hair color do they put on the drivers licenses of bald men?
I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and
forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office?
What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put
their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen could look for them
while they delivered the mail?
No one ever says, "It's only a game", when their team is winning.
Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?
My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60.
She's 97 now, and we don't know where she is.
If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.
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